The Round-Up: Some serious jaw-ing going on in Oakland; the Mets just can't catch a break

By Fernando Gallo

I don't know if he's a good coach, but he's got a monster left hook

So Tom Cable was somehow involved in the breaking of assistant coach Randy Hanson’s jaw - are we supposed to be surprised about this? In recent years, there hasn’t been a more dysfunctional franchise in professional sports than the Oakland Raiders. There are pathetic teams (hello Detroit Lions and Pittsburgh Pirates), but Oakland is the only team that still makes it entertaining. The real trouble is not Hanson’s broken jaw, or even that the Napa, Calif. police are investigating the matter - the real concern for Raider Nation is that Cable is not the first head coach to have problems with Hanson. Lane Kiffin suspended Hanson last season, which was reportedly one of the things that set Al Davis off and played a part in his firing (although I suppose losing 15 of 20 games didn't help). If cryptkeeper, er, Davis wants Hanson there, he ain’t going anywhere, so Cable better find somewhere quiet to put him and then leave him alone. Otherwise, Cable will be adding to California’s horrendous unemployment rate.

And yet, they still charge full price to go to the games

What do we know so far about the NFL in 2009, based on two weeks of preseason? The Raiders are second in points per game (25.5), the Cardinals are second-to-last (8), Tarvaris Jackson completed 12 of 15 passes to spark a great comeback win for Minnesota, and 49ers rookie running back Glen Coffee has more than three times as many rushing yards (196) as Adrian Peterson (64). Which proves yet again that the preseason is about as meaningless as a Clippers - Bobcats game in April.

Three outs, one player, zero happiness in Queens

Eric Bruntlett of the Phillies completed an unassisted triple play on Sunday, which doesn’t seem that special, but you’d be surprised: There have actually been fewer of them than perfect games. Bruntlett’s feat was the fifteenth such accomplishment in major league history, while Mark Buehrle threw baseball’s eighteenth perfect game this season. The fact that it happened against the Mets to end a game in which they had two runners on with no outs is more noteworthy to me. Since New York’s spectacular collapse to lose the NL East on the last day of the season in 2007, has there been a team with worse luck? In 2008, the Mets were eliminated from the playoffs on the season’s last day yet again (and both times the Marlins did them in), and they’ve celebrated the opening of a new stadium by stumbling to a 57-67 record. If it weren’t for the fact that they play in the same division as the lowly Washington Nationals, the Mets would surely be in last place.